I’m back for Sunday Favorites, hosted by Chari at Happy to Design. She’s such a great hostess, you don’t want to miss this.
A Few Things My Parents Taught Me
As a babyboomer, I face two trains of thought:
A. There will not be enough social security, TRS money , ________ money (fill in the blank), water,non-polluted air, oil, or non-toxic food to meet the needs of a joyful, peaceful retirement,not only for us, but for future generations as well,
Or,
B. I am the progeny of the last great generation in the universe, and I don't care what you throw at their offspring, we are going to figure it out , or more importantly, be able to live with it because our parents taught us 'things'.
My parents taught me -
*To not interrupt. This is on our endangered species list, I will admit. Because I learned this so well, I do a great deal of listening. I also learned this lesson so well that I will stop, when I get interrupted, to allow the other person to continue with his/her interruption.
*To allow company to go first. You go ahead. Here, get in front of me.
*To not brag.
*To keep a tight rein.
*To not exclude anyone. Invite everyone.
*To not talk about where you were invited.
*To reach out to someone at boarding school, who was homesick too.
*To say yes mam and no mam.
*To love just a little bit of the Honky Tonk. Well, maybe to just love the Honky Tonk.
*To bow up when things don't feel right.
*To not run when crossing the street.
*To not ask how someone voted.
*To understand when my father said, "You don't have any business doing that," or "Did you learn anything?"
*To say thank you.
*To tell people they look nice, or did a good job, or that things are going to be OK.
*To say I love you .
This is not a finite list.
But I want to hear from you. What did you learn?
31 comments:
Your parents sound like very lovely people. Sounds like my father's teachings. He was more of the disciplinarian. Momma was the nurturer and great Italian cook who fed us if we were sad or happy or worried or excited, etc. So, yes, she fed us a lot of good food for every emotion or occasion. Too bad she doesn't live near by to feed my flu that I'm suffering from. Enjoyed your blog. I'm now a "follower",
Great post. My parents taught me to respect my elders, know right from wrong and to stay away from the wrong, to stand up for myself ALWAYS, to appreciate simple things, and lastly how to work hard! My parents truly taught me by example. I don't think they ever even knew they were doing it. I often wonder what my kids will say I taught them. Sometimes I shudder to think.
I had a very European upbringing, but your list has a very familiar ring to it. I was raised my only my mother. She was always gracious and loving, but she knew the "golden rules" and she could be tough if she needed to be. My sister and I always wanted her respect because we respected her so much.
-I learned that when a much older person enters the room, you should rise... especially the men when an older women enters. I don't see that anymore, but my father never forgot that rule. (I'm not sure I taught that to my sons... shame on me!)
- Men should remove their hats/caps once they enter a building. My husband was such a stickler on that with the boys and their friends that not long ago a, then, 36 year old friend of one of our sons actually ripped his cap off his head after being in our home for about ten minutes. He quickly stated, "Sorry, Mr. Peterson. I forgot." We had a great laugh over that one and realized that our little house rules might not have been pushed by the wayside after all.
- No "fairies" (elbows) on the table.
- The blessing was a must before eating.
- No TV on in the home while eating. My youngest son abides by this strictly at the ripe old age of 28.
- A football corsage was locally acceptable to wear to church the next day as long as you cut the streamers off. (So much for growing up in a college town.)
There are so many more lessons... and I think this would be a great book. ;-)
Karen
- Respect my elders
- Don't make an innocent comment about a neighbor's only having plastic drink cups and no glasses, in front of your parents and that neighbor....learned this one the hard way
- Don't follow the crowd...one of my Dad's favorite sayings was 'If so and so jumped in the lake, would you jump in too?'
- Hard work will bring you rewards, don't look for a hand out
- Children should be quiet, unless playing outdoors
- Be self sufficient. I made many of my clothes during my high school years, so I could be sure and wear the same styles as the other girls. Otherwise, my Mom would have had me in gathered skirts that had gone out of style eons ago.
- The way to a Man, is through his stomach...this one has proven to be a true one over the years, first with the hubby and then with the sons in laws.
- Crying doesn't solve anything ... figure out the solution.
As you can see, there was a lot of tough love with my parents, but it does shape who we become as adults. As a result, I would be a good person to be with if you get stuck on a desert island. I could weave plates and flatware from palm fronds, boil rocks and plants to make a hearty broth and build a plane from the shells and trees on the island and use the seawater and sand to come up with a fuel efficient alternative to power the plane!!
Well now that is a familiar list! Your parents raised you well, and these are things I hope I have managed to teach our own daughters.
I had one other rule -- don't interrupt Mama when she's on the phone "unless you are bleeding or your clothes are on fire."
My girls learned that one fast. Also, never say you are bored -- if you are, it means Mama hasn't found enough HOUSEWORK for you to do!
Great post, thanks for sharing!
Cass
My parents stressed overall good manners. I often wonder if younger parents of today even think to teach this. I have a friend whose son has always been a terror. Her comment was that he was "just being a boy." Well, unfortunately, her "boy" is going to end up in a lot of trouble some day... As for specifics- I was always taught that you addressed an elder, not by their given name, but as Mr. or Mrs. Our son always does this, unless so instructed to do else wise by that person. Hope all is going well, Laura.
Laura what a wonderful list. You have great parents.
I would have to say I was taught incredible strength. I'm very grateful.
Have a blessed Sunday. ~Melissa :)
I loved this. thank you for stopping by. I wish I had all day to spend here....packing for a little vacation....My favorite thing my dad taught me..."You need to find someone that will love you like your old man." I did.
Glad to find each other.
Karen Eileen
One more thing...Loved this so much. Before I go I will have one more post, linking back to you and your great idea and blog.....
love charming posts.....I also learned "to share" ;)
Great post.
Glenda
Love your list - very similar to mine.
No elbows on the table.
May I be excused.
Always introduce people.
Always write thank you notes.
Don't ask how much something cost or brag about what it cost. {I have amended that to brag when you get it for nearly nothing at TJ Maxx- we didn't have discount stores when I was growing up}
Just a few. Great Post!!
Hi Laura,
Thanks for stopping by my blog. Good luck with the WW, I have gone astray, evident by my last post re: Jay's! Maybe you can pump me up! I'm following you, too!
Great list, and as a baby boomer from Wisconsin, I would have to add, respect the dairy farmers, pretend to like polka music and always cheer for the Packers!!!
Hi Laura...
So glad that you joined in with Sunday Favorites again this week, my friend! This was a great post!!! Ohhh my, I do think that so many of the younger generation just aren't being taught these things anymore! Each and every point on your list sounded so familiar...my parents taught and stressed these things! A couple of other things come to mind...that children should get up from their chairs and offer them to an adult when an adult comes into the room...and...that when we had company over the children needed to go and play...no hanging out with the adults!
Thank you for the reminder, my friend...this is a great list of manners and etiquette that I, as an adult, should still follow!!!
Have a super Sunday!
Chari
I learned from my mother to be creative and to dream.
Some of the things my sons learned:
-no hats indoors
-open doors and hold them for others
-look people in the eyes when you speak to them
I have to say my sons (22 & 26) are very clean cut and polite but often are treated less than respectful by "their elders" when in stores, banks etc.
A few I remember being told:
on gossiping:
"don't say something behind someones back that you wouldn't say to their face"
On rude people:
"When someone isn't treating you right, don't lower yourself and act the same way"
On being "bored":
"if you don't enjoy your own company, why should anyone else?"
I wish all parents would use this list as an owners manual. Very similar to my growing up.
You can add:
Do not under any circumstances open your Mother's purse and look around. Don't know why that was but it just was. My husband was raised that way too.
My grandmother always said.
Pretty is as pretty does...we're gonna love you no matter what, but we want other's to love you too.
Put your napkin in your lap.
Oh, and don't marry a Yankee. haha (that one still makes me laugh)
♥
Joy
Sounds like our parents were exactly the same! We are two lucky gals!:-)
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